Close your eyes and imagine the most colourful toadstool in your mind’s eye. Can you see it? You know the one that we invariably see when opening children’s fairy tale books. Bright scarlet cap dotted with white warts.
Swellendam hikers and Penny Bun hunters have seen and photographed it, as it is very attractive. It has a symbiotic relationship with the Pine or Christmas tree, an alien species in South Africa.
The word Toadstool came from German Tod-stuhl, (pronounced ‘taught schtool) which, translated, means Death stool. We have been ‘educated’ to believe that toadstools are poisonous, possibly deadly.
Well, admittedly it does have a few toxins which we are able to metabolise with scary side effects but our clever ancestors used their herd animals to filter out the toxins, and gained an exotic liquid, “Ambrosia” to the ancient Greeks and “Soma” to the Hindu’s.
Prior to Christianity enveloping Europe our ancestors used this liquid to connect with the Divine. It was the Pagan religion and it firmly kept Christianity at bay and so the mushroom/toadstool had to go…………. and go it did.
Remember when Granny used to say “never touch the mushrooms in the woods”. I was so frightened (especially by Granny) and fascinated at the s me time; I used to kick them over in disgust (fear).
Take a hike
I notice, when walking in the woods in Swellendam, that people do the same thing today, perhaps as an expression of indoctrinated disgust for toadstools. This fear of fungi is still with us and perhaps it is harkening back through our ancestral memory. Even the more traditional European Afrikaans speaking people refer to mushrooms and toadstools as ‘duiwels kos *, cute hey.
♫the wind beneath my wings♪
If you remember the 60s, when L.S.D.* was all the rage, there were often reports of people jumping out of windows, believing that they could fly and that they saw the face of God. Naturally occurring hallucinogens can also have this effect but now we are wiser and don’t jump out of windows, just fly in our minds.
The milder intoxicant, Mary Jane has the effect of making one laugh uncontrollably, like “Ho, ho, ho”.
Similarly with the toadstool but wait please, I am about to tie up the ends!
Oh deer me!
Siberians still herd deer today, as we of the Europe also did long ago before
Cows took over as they are more docile and easily manageable.
Deer, under the influence, were difficult sods, I expect. One only needs to read the names of Father Christmas’s reindeer to know how belligerent the buggers were. Prancer, Dancer, Comet, Cupid, Vixen, Blitzen, Donder, Dasher and Rudolph. One could hardly use the names we use for cows like Daisy or Moo, far too placid. Interestingly Donder and Blitzen translated means Thunder and Lightning (portentous of rain) much needed for mushroom growth.
As the animals of the woods have an instinctive fondness partaking of the hallucinogenic substance, the Siberian Shamans allow the deer to eat the toadstool and even feed it to them. Shaman then hovers with a cup until the deer goes for a wee and collects the liquid. Wee is after all sterile and the toxins have been metabolized but the active ingredient can remain in the animal wee for many days.
Prior to our current priests we also had village Shamans, who were most often female. Yes, the new religion had to eradicate them as well because of their connections with the supply of the liquid, ‘hubble bubble toil and trouble’ so we either drowned them or burnt them, a bit, in their thousands.
She, of the woods however, fed the toadstool to the deer which are termed Rein-deer when under rein.
Princess and the Frog
She also boiled in the same cauldron other exciting herbs for specific purposes, like Mandrake, Hemlock and Henbane and she even used frogs of a certain species which exudes a liquid from its skin, when threatened, which is hallucinogenic if drank. I think bat wings were an exaggeration though.
The mythological story of kissing a frog and it turns into a Prince comes directly from anecdotes about hallucinogenic frogs. So if you kiss the right frog you too can have a Prince for the duration of the effects.
Conversely when Camilla first kissed Charles they both turned into frogs but they got better. Well they did,……………………… didn’t they?
On Saturday, which was then the Sabbath, the village would gather in a lodge, then and today it is called an Inn or pub. The Shaman would pass around a cup of wee for the locals to have a collective and connective religious experience and paying homage to the seven visible deities*.
In exuberant celebration of the magic mushroom we brought deodar (European pine) trees into our homes and we decorated them with brightly coloured mushrooms, as this is where the fungi grows in the wild woods in a symbiotic relationship with the Christmas tree on the roots of the tree.
We have in recent years substituted the toadstool with red glass baubles with white dots on them and we hang them on the tree, we used to put the mushrooms at the base, where they belong, as presents for the family.
One can still buy the baubles in the colour, and they are even found with a domed shape of a smiling, red cheeked, face donned with a red cap with white dots on the rim.
Today, we have forgotten what Christmas celebrations are all about but the oldest religious texts in the world, the Rig Veda, has many verses in praise of this magic mushroom (Soma).
The toadstool was scarce during deep Winter snow, so they would be gathered in and hung to dry by the log fire as a means of preserving the vrot* prone fungi, to be certain that we could still have the ‘experience’ during Christmas, when the fungi were deep in the S… you know what, and we suffered from ‘cabin sickness’. (I can’t use the Afrikaans term for this, it is too naughty but it goes like this…Kya bef*cked and needed something to alleviate the dark winter, being bored. )
Trink, Trink, Bruederlein Trink
Similarly the Americans, still today, hang a red and white sock/stocking over the fireplace to emulate the drying of the toadstool during winter. Once the Mushroom is dried, the skin takes on the texture and colour of a brown bull’s skin being red and, giving a kick after partaking, it was referred to as “Red Bull”.
Coca Cola was originally made with coca, from which cocaine was derived, and it is an incredibly successful product. Their colours are red and white.
‘Red Bull’ also harkens back to a mere memory of a mushroom drug. Perhaps success is attributable to the name given to the product, which sparks a pleasant ancestral memory deep within us.
So, who is with me: let’s start up a cool drink company and we will call our successful drink Reindeer Piss ®. Together we will make a fortune.
One characteristic effect of the dye in the red Mushroom is that it can, dependant on the dose, cause a red glow to the facial skin and nose. Hence:
♫Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer
had a very shiny nose.
And if you ever saw him,
you would even say it glows. ♪
I often wondered why Moses went up into the mountains where the trees grow that are synergistic with the mushroom. As with the Pagan who saw the divine so did Moses but then his face turned red, so he wore a veil to disguise the glow from his face because his people would sus which God it was he spoke to.
♫Mothers little helper♪
I am told by imbibers (no references supplied upon request) that, when under the influence, they more often than not see small people who are eclectically dressed and are going about their business which appears to be tacking things together which are indeterminate.
Santa has little helpers going about their business making presents for the children, doesn’t he?
If we connect up the dots on the rim, we have red noses, flying Reindeer, a short, fat fella dressed up as a mushroom laughing uncontrollably with a red face, flying through the air delivering presents tacked together by the little people who Minkie would call “the Elementals”.
The hierarchy of the Christian church has, in recent years come to accepted that both Easter and Christmas are actually Pagan celebrations and there are calls to drop the celebrations of the presumed birth and death of their saviour
The origin of putting presents under the Christmas tree came from the fact that it is under this tree, where the great gift of this unique sacred plant can be found. In shamanic cultures, it was taken communally as a holy sacrament in the heart of winter (death) to mark the return of the Sun and life, through personal communion with Divinity.
Light the candles everyone to celebrate “The return of the Sun” (Son in Christianity) and take a bite, it will change you forever and give you a present which you can only have in your wildest dreams, like cosmic consciousness and immortality and mind freedom. No wonder it had to go, hey!
Alice in Wonderland
Lewis Carroll alluded to this same toadstool in the story of Alice in Wonderland as the entire story is nonsensical until one has the key that unlocks the door upon which the story is based. Alice ate and drank (a reference to deer piss) from the toadstool and went on a trip seeing little people and rabbits and other animals talk to her, even playing cards. Remember the Caterpillar sitting on a toadstool, smoking a hookah or Opium pipe, giving some strange replies to Alice’s questions which were fairly typical answers of a stoned person.
The Amanita Muscaria or Fly Agaric has a very long and ‘colourful’ history in our ancestral culture, especially the association with Yule (Christmas) time and the short, fat fella with a sack of Mushrooms.
I do fully understand that Christianity had to inveigle Pagan ceremonies into its realms, in order to get our ancestors to acquiesce and I will write about Easter from an alternative view soon, if the editor will allow it after this article.
Now you know where Father Christmas really came from.
Merry Christmas everybody. Ho, ho, ho.
Guillaumé le Polémiste Païen
* Duiwels kos = food of the devil.
* Pharmaceutical companies take naturally occurring healing plants and alter them in order to be able to patent them and make disgusting amounts of money out of a plant which occurs naturally and one can go pick them for ones- self and get the benefits from.
L.S.D. is no exception it is extracted from the common Morning Glory seeds. Better to harvest them yourself and enjoy the benefits of having your eyes opened to reality of consciousness. Contrary to popular propaganda L.S.D. is not addictive and one cannot become physically dependant upon it as with any other naturally occurring drug.
Only man made or created chemicals drugs (synthesized from plants then chemically reproducing only the active ingredient. A dangerous practice I’d say) can cause physical addiction for a malevolent purpose.
* This refers to the ancient practice of revering the planets as intermediates to God.
For example many ancient stories (not Brüder Grimm as in Grimm’s tales) have a message,
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs refers to the moon which at a certain time of the year is
snow white and the planets are all visible at this specific time..
* Vrot (Afrikaans) = rotten